


Reawakening

by Kruvvy_Starcrusher



Category: Star Wars, Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy, The Force Awakens - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Star Wars Setting, Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Earned Trust, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Smut, F/M, Female Badass, Flashbacks, Fluff and Angst, Force Bond (Star Wars), Mutual Pining, Not Canon Compliant, Original Female Character - Freeform, Possessive Kylo Ren, Post-Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Protective Kylo Ren, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-11
Updated: 2021-01-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:22:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 14
Words: 22,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26404924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kruvvy_Starcrusher/pseuds/Kruvvy_Starcrusher
Summary: Kylo Ren's eyes shot open as he felt an intense heat blanket over him. Sweat began trickling down his forehead in small beads as he propped himself onto his elbows while feeling an electric tingling course through his body. His dark living quarters on the Supremacy were peacefully still. Yet, he could sense the static energy emanating he felt on his skin resonating in every corner of the room.Ren had experienced a similar reaction, though much less intense, when sensing the scavenger reaching out across the galaxy. But this... What he had felt now was like being suddenly dropped into a furnace erupting with flames and lightening.It wasintoxicating.The Force was strong with whoever had caused this disturbance. And Kylo knew he must consult his master, Supreme Leader Snoke, to assure he was aware of this occurrence. Then Kylo Ren would find whoever this Force user was... even if it was the last thing he did.
Relationships: Ben Solo/Original Female Character(s), Kylo Ren & Original Female Character(s), Kylo Ren/Original Female Character, Kylo Ren/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 49





	1. Misplaced Judgement

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! 
> 
> I started this story when TFA was released, but began to lose interest. However, I’ve got some new inspiration and plan on finishing this piece. I welcome and love comments/feedback. And if you want, check out my other Star Wars fanfic I’m working on in tandem with this one. Thank you!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jakku is just not a good planet to be stuck on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m in the process of changing the female protagonist’s name since I saw another story with an OC of the same name. So please be patient with me! Sorry!

"Thief! Stop her!”

Seraph could barely hear the shouts of the vendor she had stolen power couplings from as she bobbed and weaved between citizens of the desert city on Jakku. 

Dozens of boots thudded not too far behind her.

‘ _Are these idiots really trying to catch me over some cheap ass parts?_ ’ She thought in surprise as she continued to plow through the hordes of beings that crowded the street.

The agonizing sun pounded down on the city with an oppressiveness Seraph had never experienced on any planet before. Sweat drenched her entire body as the people pushing their way through the market place closed in. It was silly to think her plans would work out absent of any real issues. But, when she had philandered her way into the mechanic’s ship hanger from just making subtle sexual innuendos she thought things were going to go her way.

She couldn't have been more wrong. 

“STOP OR I **WILL SHOOT**!”

Panicked screams from the surrounding market inhabitants began to fill the air which probably meant, Seraph could only assume, the mechanic was brandishing a damn blaster that was intended to be pointed at her. 

Stopping on this stiflingly hot planet was not planned, but her old cargo ship she had “acquired” on the outer rim of the galaxy almost a decade ago was about to fall apart… Again.

‘ _Where the hell did I park my speeder?’_ She pondered franticly as she made a sharp turn down a deserted alleyway. 

Seraph’s lean, but muscular build and small stature made it easy for her to outrun most law enforcement officers wearing bulky armor on a majority of planets. Nonetheless, she knew that if she didn’t find her speeder bike soon she would be screwed. Unwrapping the scarf from around her mouth, she brought the communication band on her left wrist up to her chin. 

“BB-7W, where did I park my damn speeder bike?” She whispered into the com.

Beeps and clicks angrily erupted from the speaker as Seraph’s Astromech droid back on the cargo ship chided her about here bad memory. She groaned as she replaced the scarf over her mouth and adjusted her riding googles and hood. 

“Alright, **ALRIGHT!**.. You know I hate using the stupid Force to find things B-Dubs. But, if it gets you to stop with the attitude then fine.” Seraph spat back into the com with a scowl. 

“I don’t know why I picked up that stupid piece of scrap metal.” She sighed as she closed her eyes and tried clearing her mind.

More vicious beeps exploded the speaker of the communication band now by her side.

‘ _Oh, B-Dubs is spicy today.’_ she mused as a slight smile lifted the corner of her lips.

For years Seraph and her little round droid had roamed the outer planets and moons in the 'Unknown Regions' of the galaxy on the clunker cargo ship she lovingly named Pack Rat, avoiding any areas where The First Order and The Resistance had sunk their teeth into. 

That is, until now.

Trying to evade a traveling band of smugglers she owed money to, Seraph made a poor judgement call and ventured into territories patrolled by the First Order. And _OF COURSE_ that was when the ship started making sounds like it was going to crack in two. BB-7W had suggested backtracking to a moon base that wasn’t too far away, but Seraph thought the ship would die before they made it.. And being on a broke down ship floating in space was not an ideal situation. Thus, the decision to land on Jakku was made. 

With her eyes still closed, Seraph pictured her rusty speeder bike and a pathway to its location began to materialize in her mind. 

She took off running as soon as the way to her speeder was clear and used the Force to help her detect the presence of any law officers that may be looking for her. While she was afraid of bumping into the disgruntled and armed mechanic, the hood of her flowing brown cape that draped over the shoulders of her long sleeved green top helped her blend in with the people of the city. Most of the surrounding citizens covered their face with some kind of protection prevent sand from blowing into their orifices, so with a scarf covering her features, a hood hiding her hair color, and goggles perched on the crest of her head, her outfit let her fade into the crowd easily. Seraph always tried to dress like the locals on any planet she went to. And while at first she was not a fan of the neutral colored clothing items she had donned at the beginning of her adventure, she was starting to appreciate how the mid-calf high Bantha suede boots and loose fitting tan pants allowed for plenty of freedom to move. 

Finally, after twisting and turning through the maze of streets she found her speeder parked behind a deserted merchants booth. Placing the power couplings in the side saddle bags, she looked over her shoulder and swore. To her surprise a small group Stormtroopers from the First Order were running not far behind her. 

_‘Why couldn’t I sense them?’_ She agitatedly thought as she eyed the group gaining on her. _‘Whatever, I don't know why I expect more, it's not like I ever trained with someone to control this Force shit or anything.’_

Seraph turned away from the speeder and started to push her hands forward from her body with her palms facing the Stormtroopers, harnessing her powers to knock back the advancing group.

Then, it happened

A searing ache began to blossom from between Seraph’s eyes then grew to envelop her entire head, blinding her with pain. She fell to one knee with her hands clasped to her temples. The pounding on her brain had caused her vision to go completely white and she ground her teeth in strained fury. Then she head a raspy deep voice echo in her mind. 

**_'You can’t hind anymore, I’ve found you.'_ **

Desperately fighting the throbbing stabs resonating through her skull, Seraph struggled back to her feet and mounted her speeder. The group of Stormtroopers were almost upon her as she powered on the machine and shifted it into gear, smashing the accelerator forward in a blind panic using the Force to try and sense a way to steer. 

Concerned whistles began winding up from her communication band as BB-7W worriedly babbled to Seraph. 

“Yeah, I know, they surprised me too. It’s ok. Just have the ship ready for takeoff when I get back... we need to go as soon as possible!” She shouted through the wind blasting past her face, hoping her friend could hear her. 

Eventually her eyes were finally clear enough for her to see where she was going without using the Force to guide her, with only small patches of white interfering with her sight in little bursts.

Once Seraph cleared the city limits, she pushed the accelerator to its limit trying to get back to her ship as quickly as she could. But, as soon as she could see the metal mass she called home she observed that BB-7W was not the only thing waiting for her return. A small army of Stormtroopers had surrounded the Pack Rat with their assumed leader standing in front of the docking ramp gleaming in silver armor and with their foot firmly placed on top of BB-7W’s spherical main body. Seraph let out an angry cry as she saw her beloved droid being ground into the sand. Not even bothering to stop her speeder completely, Seraph leapt off and ran towards the shining trooper while trying to ignore the continued pain still raking over her mind.

She began to push outwards away from her body with the Force, trying to create a wave of energy to knock the chrome Stormtrooper off their feet so she could free her friend. Yet, after a few steps her body froze in mid-stride. She tried moving forward again, but failed. Soon she was trying in panic to extend her mind with the Force but something, or someone, was preventing her from doing so. Screaming in anger, she fought the oppression with every atom of her body and was able to take one small step forward.

“Impressive, but I suggest you stop before you give yourself a brain aneurysm. You are too unskilled and wild to harness the Force like that.” An authoritative robotic voice teased from inside the Pack Rat.

Seraph’s eyes moved away from her droid and toward the boarding ramp. 

A black clad, tall, and imposing figure began striding down the ship’s ramp. His lumbering presence seemed to drown out the small army that was with him. A sleek black helmet completely covered the face and head of the dark being, but Seraph knew who it was.

Kylo Ren.

Once his menacing frame came into full view, she felt a tugging sensation in her chest. An invisible connection instantly sprouted in her and quickly grew into an intolerable strain; fiercely demanding that she try and move forward and touch him. All her thoughts revolved around a desperate need to feel whatever skin was underneath all the thick fabric of his attire. The intensity of the feeling caught her off guard and disgusted her, but also intrigued her. 

“My master and I have been searching for you. The aura you emanate has such a power we could feel it half way across the galaxy, but now seeing you I can’t believe such a pathetic being as yourself could have such a capability.”

“Let my friend go or I’ll show you what this pathetic being can do.” Seraph roared through gritted teeth as Ren's Force grip encapsulated her body tighter. 

“Oh, this junk? I wouldn’t waste my time damaging this droid since it already looks pretty destroyed.” Ren chortled as he stepped off the loading ramp and began taking long strides towards Seraph.

“Now, let me see the face of this **creature** my master has me searching garbage planets for.”

With a wave of Ren’s hand Seraph’s hood fell back, exposing two long braids of thick burgundy hair. She gasped as the vice grip around her lungs began to strengthen in her continued fight against Ren's Force. However, with every inch closer he got, the more useless her struggling became. 

Slightly bending down, one leather-gloved hand grabbed at Seraph’s goggles and wrenched them from her head while pulling down the scarf covering her nose and mouth. 

Even with the helmet modulating his voice, Seraph could hear his sharp intake of breath. Was the great and powerful Kylo Ren surprised when he saw her face? 

_'Did he feel the connection as well?_

Her light grey eyes board into the slits of Ren’s helmet as her red chapped lips formed into a thin line. Her pale skin began to instantly flush red from the sudden exposure to the sun and pent up aggression. Now with her view unobstructed, the magnetic tension that was forming between them was almost palpable. Seraph’s wanted to demand Ren to remove his helmet, but reason washed back over her as she remembered the reality of the situation she was in.

“You’re coming with me.” Kylo Ren declared flatly as he stared down into her eyes.

And in that moment, fury took complete control or Seraph’s senses and she spat into the face of Ren’s helmet. One thought blasted through Seraph's mind over and over, without relenting before she decided to speak. 

' _I will not be captured by this demon.'_

“You bastard, why would you want a street urchin like me? Wouldn't you rather murder children or kil--.” 

Seraph’s words fell silent as Ren reached his hand towards her face and used the Force to send her into a coma-like sleep.

Frustrated, Kylo Ren took the sleeve of his arm and wiped the mucous from his helmeted face. “Take the girl and her stupid droid to the transport ship. We are leaving for the Supremacy at once.” 

“Yes, my lord.” Stated the silver stormtrooper in a feminine voice as she lifted the droid and tucked in under her arm as it shrilled in a rampage. 

“And shut that thing up, I refuse to have anyone listening to the ramblings of a rusted old droid for the entire journey back to the Supremacy.” Ren hissed as he released Seraph from his Force grip letting her sink to the ground.


	2. Silence in Space

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo Ren sits in his TIE Fighter and contemplates his new prisoner.

As Kylo Ren starred at the girl's relaxed face as she laid sprawled in the sand his tension headache slackened. Yet, a troublesome feeling began to seed itself into the pit of his stomach… Was it guilt he felt? Shame? Longing?

"Sir, Will the troopers be coming back on the transporter with me, or shall we send a retrieval ship for them?" 

Captain Phasma's question pulled Ren back to reality.

"Take her and go." He snapped as he moved his eyes off her reluctantly. 

Sullen at the thought of whatever emotions had begun showing themselves at the sight of a small filthy thief, he turned his back to Phasma and stomped towards his TIE Fighter as quickly as he could.

Once out of Jakku's atmosphere, Ren set the ships control to autopilot and ripped his helmet off. 

He let the silence fill him.

The only time he ever truly felt alone was when he was hurtling through space in his ship. He knew that it was all an illusion; at any time Snoke could enter his mind. Nonetheless, gazing out into the vast blackness of the galaxy with only the controls of the fighter surrounding him gave him the ability to pretend he had true solitude. 

Leaning back into his chair, Ren's mind began to wander about the events that transpired since he first felt the girls presence. A presence so strong that it had woken him from slumber and made all other Force connections seem insignificant. 

For weeks he had been communicating with the young Jedi Rey with their Force connection, trying to coax her to his side. He felt an attraction to Rey; her smart features and unique accent made him want her. Plus, her usage of the Force was beyond what she could learn if she found Luke. Ren had even once hoped that if she did ever find his uncle, they could form some kind of partnership and bring him down together.

However, ever since the other girl’s powers had made themselves known through out the galaxy a couple days ago, Ren was obsessed with finding the source. All thoughts of a union with Rey had been set on the back burner the moment he awoke to the warm electrical waves resonating through the stars from the person he had just captured. 

The Force connection he shared with this girl was something entirely different than ones he had experienced previously with Rey or any interaction from Snoke or Luke. Instead of the Force making the person materialize in visions or letting intruding thoughts from the other person enter his mind, it was manifesting in physical sensations and emotions. And to his disgust, he was already infatuated with whatever he felt in the presence of that girl.

That same night Kylo had been awoken, he had begged for an emergency meeting with Supreme Leader Snoke. He had conveyed the ferocity of what he had felt in his quarters and was still experiencing as he stood in front of his master. After he finished frantically recounting everything, Snoke had laughed. 

"It took you this long to finally feel this magnificent being within our solar system? Pathetic." The haggard creature mocked as Ren kneeled before his throne. 

"I thought by diminishing one of the last sources of Light teasing you away from the Dark Side, all interference with your power would have ended. But I was wrong. You are still **weak**."

A grimace spread across Ren's face as he remembered his Master's words. He continuously strived to follow Snoke's demands. He had tried to eradicate all the Light in him. And after murdering his father, he thought It the Dark Side would consume him. For a while the a more profound connection to the dark coursing through him began to overwhelm the pain and wrong feelings of what he had done, leaving him mostly numb with slight intrusions from primal desires like anger or arousal. 

Things began to chance once he laid eyes on the girl they captured on Jakku. Ren felt a sliver of light beginning to shine into his conscious again. And it made him more angry than anything ever had before. Maybe that was why his master was so determined to find her now that he had become aware of her presence? 

Over and over again Ren had tried so hard to destroy the shimmering glow inside of him, only to have it slither itself back into his psyche  
when seeing a female’s face.

 _'Damn that space-witch. I don't even know her and she has been on my mind longer than any other woman in my life._ ' Ren seethed as he slammed his fist down on the center control console.

Before long, alerts began to ring throughout the TIE fighter indicating that The Supremacy was within range for boarding.

_'I will get answers. I will find out who this girl is and why this is happening.'_


	3. Laughter

Seraph knew that she should hypothetically still be knocked out cold, but her own haphazard connection of the Force pushed her back into the waking world. 

Struggling to remain semi-conscious, it felt like she had a hangover from a three-night non-stop drinking bender that she tries to cure by throwing her brains in a blender. She attempted opening her eyes, but the light from where ever she was sent splinters of pain through her forehead. Groaning, she just decided to let her limp body jostle slightly side to side in the seat she was harnessed into. 

Everything ached.

Eventually, she gathered enough impetus to allow her eyes to adjust to the glaring fluorescents. Which, in hindsight, was a dumb idea; she should have just remained silent and still after her observations. 

She was on a First Order Transporter ship and she was utterly alone.

There were no Stormtroopers or crew members buckled into any of the seats around her. Seraph knee there had to be someone flying the ship, but the cockpit was far into the front of the ship and shut behind grey metal doors. So as far as she concerned, it was just her and the pilot in the metal tube hurtling through space. 

' _This is not ok_.'

Desperate for some sort of normalcy, Seraph frantically tried piecing together the limited memories she had of the events that transpired before she woke up in this strange environment. 

' _What the hell happened?'_

Getting frustrated at her lack of brainpower and feeling dizzy every time she thought too hard, Seraph attempted to backtrack the events that led her and BB-7W to land of Jakku in the first. 

_’Great… B-Dubs is never going to let me live this one down… That rustbucket told me stopping on Jakku was a bad idea, but did I listen? Of course not. '_

Suddenly every detail of what transpired before her unconsciousness slammed into her memory. 

Despite the tiny desire to find out what Kylo Ren wanted nagging at the back of her mind, she couldn't focus on anything that occurred other than the last memory of her only friend she had was watching the poor droid being smashed into the ground under some chrome troglodyte's heel before she was knocked out. Panicked, Seraph tried to sense BB-7W's presence using the Force. However, she was unable to locate any mechanical power belonging to the small droid.

**"WHERE THE FUCK IS MY DROID?!"**

Seraph shrieked as she thrashed around in her seat. Though her wrists were tightly bound together, her legs were free to move which allowed her to kick and stomp to demand attention.

"Well, well, you should still be asleep." A distorted feminine voice hissed from out of Seraph's line of sight "The Commander is not going to be happy when he finds out you awoke before we made it back to The Supremacy."

"Where is my droid? I can’t sense it. **WHAT DID YOU DO?!** "

"Relax." The voice cooed smoothly. "Your little ball of wires and bolts is just shut down and in storage. The Commander ordered me to take it back with you."

Relief washed over Seraph as she let out a strangled sigh. She somehow felt the trooper wasn't deceiving her about the droid's whereabouts, which made it possible for her to concentrate on other pressing matters.

Like getting out of this mess.

Not wanting to waste any time trying to figure out the specifics as to why she was picked up, Seraph quickly decided it was a prime idea to continue slapdashedly using the Force on people to attempt a peaceful escape. With the headache still hammering away, she did not want to physically fight anyone unless it was completely necessary.

Targeting the trooper who had just spoken, Seraph began lacing chosen words with the Force of persuasion in her mind. This captor was probably weak-minded, being a member of the First Order and all, so some good'ol Jedi mind tricks she picked over time would most likely work. 

" _You will tell your pilot to land the ship on the nearest moon or planet. You will then release BB-7W and me from our imprisonment, forget our existence and location, and then return back to your command ship_." 

The giant silver stormtrooper who had roughed up her precious friend stepped into view and began to chuckle. From the woman’s reaction, Seraph knew that she was not dealing with some low ranking soldier who had signed their life away to the First Order or someone stole from their family to be trained into a disposable pawn. This soldier was mentally fortified; her mind was blocked off with high walls.

"The Commander said that if we found the _great_ Force user Snoke had foreseen, they may use the Force against us... So needless to say we prepared for such an event. Commander Kylo Ren was gracious enough to train me in ways of preventing **creatures** , like yourself, from entering my mind. You are lucky to have been in the presence of such a great and powerful man today."

Seraph could feel the mirth in the Stormtrooper's voice as the shining helmet board down at her.

"Now, unlike the Commander, I do not have the Force to gently lull you back to sleep nor do I have medication to knock you out with.. So we are going to be doing things my way."

A snarky smile spread across Seraph's face as she looked into the eye slits of the silver helmet above her.

"So.. You're just going to bore me to sleep by telling me all the things you adoooooooore about the Commander? Just from this little interaction, I can tell you have a small crush on that guy… But, I haaaaaate to break the news to you…. He is totally out of your league."

Seraph was laughing as the woman grabbed the collar of her shirt and threw a heavy punch in extreme rage. And she continued to laugh even after she felt her nose crack and blood started spewing everywhere.


	4. Snoke’s Interrogation

Even with his long legs, Kylo Ren had to almost jog to keep up with Supreme Leader Snoke as they rushed to the wing of the Supremacy that contained the interrogation quarters. 

In all his years of training under Master Snoke, Ren had never seen him go **IN PERSON** to question anyone. But as soon as Ren had returned to The Supremacy with news of the girl's capture, Snoke demanded to set up an inquisition with her. Once the room was ready, Snoke had practically leapt from his throne and had not slowed down his pace to the girl since.

After what seemed like an hour of winding down halls, the master and apprentice finally reached an foreboding black door. Ren observed a greedy sneer stretch across Snoke's face, knowing all too well why the being was smiling . Even with the layers of thick metal between Kylo and the girl, he could feel her power seeping through the walls as if there was nothing there. 

' _His eyes…. They have a hunger in them… a hunger to cause pain.'_

With a hiss, the door slid open to the interrogation room where the thief was shackled by her wrists and ankles to a imposing metal table angled up towards the entrance. The dark glossy walls let no light from the large florescent bulb on the ceiling escape into the corridor, yet the girl's battered face was illuminated to the point where it looked as if her skin was glowing. 

She did not display the peaceful look on her face like when Ren forced her into a sleep on Jakku, but rather she looked pained as she took quick and shallow breaths. 

She had been horrifically beaten.

Blood had trickled down in rivulets from a broken nose down her chin. A cut above her left eyebrow also had a thick trail of red leading down the side of her check. Small rips and scratches had formed all over here neck. The entirety of her face, while not ridiculously swollen, was a sickly yellowing purple color. The green top she had been wearing was stained with the copious amounts of crimson that had seeped into the fabric. The long sleeves of the top were ripped away, revealing arms that were covered in cuts and a shoulder that looked dislocated.

Ren began to see red. 

_'I will **kill** whoever did this to you.'_

Ren was no stranger to violence, beatings, and death. However, seeing this thief bound and battered made his stomach drop. He wanted to hunt down the person responsible for such damage and shove is lightsaber down their throat. Yet, upon eyeing the girl's restrained body further to see if there was any more damage, Ren could refrain from thinking how beautiful she was even with all the bruises and cuts. He was unable to reign in his emotions for her until he felt the Supreme Leader’s eyes on him. Feeling his master’s mental fingers poke his mind made Ren sickly. He had to control this light in him. 

Lost in his internal battle, Ren continued to stare at the girl from the entry. In spite of his student’s struggle, the Supreme Leader walked into the room and gazed back at him with disappointment shadowing his face.

"Do not let your emotions for this _thing_ cloud your objective my young apprentice. She will be put out of her misery once I am finished with her. Her mind holds so many secrets… I will access them and then let her rot." 

The crocked smile that gleamed on Snoke's wrinkled face following his words did not set Ren's mind at ease. In fact, Kylo began to panic thinking of the further pain this girl was about to endure.

"Wake up Seraph and Welcome to The Supremacy." Snoke beamed as he sang the words to the girl. 

The girls name reverberated through Ren.

_'Seraph…What an alluring name…’_

The thought crossed Ren's mind before he could stop himself, causing a scowl to creep over his face that was thankfully hidden by his helmet. Had this thief’s strange Force energy caused him to suffer some kind of brain damage? 

Shakely and unable to open both eyes completely, Seraph lifted her head to the Supreme Leader then turned her gaze towards Ren standing in the doorway.

The intensity of the girl's stormy eyes boring into his helmeted face made his cheeks flush. The urge to take his leather gloves off and caress her skin began to bubble in the pit of his chest and the longer she gazed at him the more intense the desire became.  
_  
'What is this space witch doing to me?'_

"Hey Commander, someone on this ship has a crush on you." She croaked weakly, grinning to expose blood stained teeth.

Ren opened his mouth to reply, but only syllables came stuttering forth from his lips. 

He knew the girl was mocking him and that he should be furious, but he could not help but admire her tenacity in spite of all that happened. Her bravado in the face of so much pain left him speechless.

With a slight twitch of his hand, the Supreme Leader used the Force to wrench the thief’s face back towards him.

"Pay no attention to my apprentice, sweet girl, I am the one interacting with you during your stay."

A shadow of fear fell upon Seraph's face as she eyed the Supreme Leader with suspension. 

"Well then, why **am** I staying here?"

Taking in her inquire, Snoke began to pace back and forth in silence allowing his long golden robes to bellow behind him.

"Well, don’t trip over yourself trying to give me answers or anything"

The flippant sarcastic remark from the girl did not sit well with the Supreme Leader. Balling long and dry fingers into fists, Snoke used the Force to rip and tear at her internal organs. A gasping scream filled the small room as she must have felt as if she was being torn apart from the inside. 

Then suddenly the scream stopped, morphing into uncontrollable sobs of pain.

"As I said, I will be the one asking questions during your stay. Now, did the Resistance send you to Jakku?"

Ren was unable to move after hearing the wail that came from the girl's lips. He wanted to stop what was about to transpire but knew that if he did, Snoke would punish him in a way similar to what he was viewing.

' _Just answer my Master's question and you will not have any more pain you stupid girl!'_ Ren internally screamed as he continued staring at the girl's tormented body.

"You seriously think I would be working with those idiots? You fools and the Resistance are like two toddlers squabbling ove-AHHHHHHHHHH." 

Seraph's answer was cut short as she let another blood-curdling scream echo off the sleek walls.

"You seem to be more difficult than I expected." Grumbled Snoke, continuing to torture her with his powers.

"Since you are not complying, I will just pluck the answers to whatever questions I have right from your little head and take some of your power along with them."

In a split second, the Supreme Leader was inches away from Seraph's face. He placed his index finger in the middle of her forehead and closed his eyes. Instantly, her body began to convulse as her eyes rolled to the back of her head and her mouth slightly fell open.

Watching the events transpire made an idea click into Kylo’s head: that this questioning event was just some kind of masquerade to cover the Supreme Leader's real intention.

To some how absorb this girl's Force.

He had tried to stay mostly silent, not wanting to defy his master in any way. However, he began to experience a newfound hatred for Snoke as he observed the jerking movements of the thief’s body. He wanted to Snoke for what he was doing to her. He had only seen the girl for a few short moments in his life, but witnessing the continued harm to her made him want to destroy every cell of Snoke's being.

Ren knew he had to say or do something before this girl died. The powers that Snoke was using on her were capabilities he had never seen before; and he knew that before long, the addicting pull he felt towards Seraph would dissipate along with her life.

"Master, Please, do not kill her!"

The speed in which the words tumbled out of Ren's mouth took both himself and Snoke by surprise, causing Snoke to cease the extraction process on Seraph. 

"And why should I not kill her **Commander** Kylo Ren?" Spat Snoke with leering emphasis on his name.

"She is uncooperative right now, but let me train her and gain her trust. This way you can get whatever answers you seek and gain another powerful warrior willing to serve you in any way. Killing her could be wasting a priceless resource"

Once he finished his proposal, a tense silence began to fill the room.

"Why would I need another member of my elite Knights of Ren when I could just take her power and be done with it, hmm?" 

Snoke's question made Ren's panic begin to flare up again. 

_'Yeah… I did not think this plan out very well at all. THINK FAST.'_

"Yes you could take her power… But Supreme Leader, instead of you putting yourself in danger on future missions and risking the possibility of injury… you could use the girl. If she gets fatally wounded in battle you could always consume her power as she lays dying, I assure you she would get back to you before she takes a final breath. And if by some chance I fail, so be it, but at least you did not put yourself at risk." 

Still facing the girl, the Supreme Leader let his thin and spindly finger lower from her forehead as he let out a sigh.

"Even though you challenged my decision to dispose of this piece of space trash, I will humor your request and let you train her. I plan on departing The Supremacy for a while anyway so I will not have to observe this debacle. When I return I expect this thing to be as obedient as a servant droid."

Turning on his heel, the Supreme Leader began to waltz out of the room, slamming into Ren's shoulder as he loomed passed him in the entranceway. The Leader continued down the corridor for a few feet then stopped, letting his gold robes ripple at his sides, but not turning around.

"If you fail at this task, it will be the last failure you ever disappoint me with."

The words lingered in the air as Ren waited until his Master was out of sight. Once he could not sense Snoke's physical presence, he rushed towards the unconscious girl weakly hanging from her shackles. Prying the restraints off of her wrist and ankles, he positioned himself to gentle catch the limp girl in his arms.

Once Seraph's body made contact with his, a fluttering feeling radiated through his chest. The power of whatever attraction he had felt seeing her doubled as she crumbled into him.

He loathed himself for savoring the feeling.

He gingerly lowered her body to the floor as he sat on his knees and tried to assess the ample amount of wounds littering her body. As he touched her arm, he could feel the fluttering in his chest turn into a lump in his throat. 

Why was her pain and suffering affecting him so? He had killed hundreds, if not thousands, with his time at the First Order. He had personally tortured the Scavenger Rey with not even an ounce of remorse. Yes he felt crippling guilt about murdering his father, but he had let the Dark Side numb that pain quickly before it became all-consuming. So why did Seraph's small session of torment leave him weak in the knees and wanting to destroy Snoke and whoever else harmed her so immensely. What power was this girl using to cause him to waver and challenge his allegiance in such a way so quickly when other actions had not?

With one arm under her knees and one arm wrapped around her shoulders, Ren lifted the girl's slack body and pulled her close to his chest as he stood. As he carried her bridal style out of the interrogation room her head lulled into his shoulder, allowing him to catch the natural sweet scent of her body mixed with the metallic undertones of blood.

He shuttered as he recognized the floral hint of honeysuckle wafting from her matted hair. 

At that moment, without even a second thought, Ren swore to himself to never let anyone take this girl from him. He had no idea who she truly was or what the connection between them meant, but he was willing to do anything to find out.


	5. Dreams and Decisions

Even in her nearly unconscious state, Seraph knew she was being carried. Struggling to open her eyes, she focused on moving her eyelids, yet her body was too exhausted to follow any commands from her brain. The unfamiliar sensation of fear began to creep into her mind, motivating her to put all her effort into fighting towards a more responsive state of being. However, with every passing second she seemed to be pulled deeper into the abyss of senselessness. 

_'If you're going to kill me do it already, stop teasing me with this suffering and end it.'_  
While fuzzy, the thought came ricocheting through her mind. And in response she felt the person carrying her clutch her closer into their chest… As if trying to comfort her?

_'What the hell is going on?'_

After some time, Seraph finally felt her body being lowered down onto soft bedding. Surprise spiked as her head hit a feathery pillow. Once again she tried desperately to speak, but it was futile. Her mouth failed, and only a hushed moan escaped her lips.

Assessing that she was safe at the moment, she decided to let her body slip back into its previous comatose like state and try to heal.

The impenetrable umbra of sleep began overtake all Seraph’s functions and as the final moments of wakefulness slipped away, the flashback nightmares began.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_"Wha… WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Callistie thundered as she tore into the barn._

_When the thin woman entered the rickety structure she found her daughter, Serpah, moving large buckets from one location to another by making them effortlessly float through the air. Witnessing the child’s abominable action filled her with blinding rage, and as she shouted, the buckets dropped to the floor with a loud bang._

_"You have been corrupted by the galaxy! This power proves it! I CANNOT BELIEVE MY CHILD WOULD BE SO **SINFUL**!" Screamed the woman mournfully as she grabbed the small girl's forearm, digging nails into delicate flesh._

_Bursting out of the barn, Callistie yanked her daughter towards their dilapidated house. Seraph tried to dig her heels in the dry ground to fight the drastic tugging movements, but her mother was just too strong. Lashing out with the Force had crossed her mind, but she was too unskilled to perform such a task while being so afraid._

_Once in the run-down kitchen, Callistie slammed the child into a splinter filled wooden chair then opened a cabinet above the counter, pulling out a spool of thick rope._

_"How could you do this to us?! Your father and I have done nothing but provide for you since you came into this world. And now you have let your sinful ways fill you with the power to destroy us all. Wait until your father hears about what I saw."_

_And as if on cue, Saros stepped into the kitchen._

_"What in the name of our great Goddess is going on?!" He exclaimed when seeing Callistie wrapping the snake-like rope around Seraph's wrists._

_"Our daughter has been tainted."_

_All color from the man’s' face faded as his eyes became vacant._

_"We must begin the cleansing, sweet husband."_

_Once tied and bound, Saros grabbed Seraph by the fabric of her dust-covered shirt and wrenched her off the chair, dragging her across the floor towards the cellar._

_The child’s father then hurtled her down the stairwell and followed into the darkness._

_"Papa, please, I promise I will never do whatever I did again. Please!” Seraph babbled through sobs as she cowered onto the cold dirt floor. “I will pray from sun up to sun down for forgiveness. You do not have to do this. Please, papa!"_

_Her strangled cries continued as Saros went to the workbench and pulled a multi-tailed whip from the counter._

_"You cannot be trusted until you are purged of the vileness within you. This flagellation will be the beginning of your forgiveness."_

_The words disappeared into the chilled walls as the man moved over Seraph's curled up body._

_"Remember, child…." Saros prodded as he raised the whip above his head. "I do this because I love you."_

_As the last syllable slipped from his lips, he slammed the whip down onto the child's body_.  
\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Seraph woke before the leather licked her skin within the dream and shot straight forward, hyperventilating. The feeling of being watched loomed over her, making her feel heavy as she struggled with the emotions the dream stirred within her.

The black sheets she was laying on were soaked with sweat and blood. It had been years since she had such an intense flashback like the one she had just experienced. Her body continued to shake as she struggled to regulate her breathing.

_'What is happening to me?'_

Hours ago she had been a free spirit with her droid, planet-hopping and acquiring what they needed whenever they needed it. Then, due to the one stupid mistake of landing on Jakku, she was kidnapped by a group of fascist psychopaths known for murdering by the thousands across the galaxy. THEN she was tortured by some decrepit looking old man-creature while gawked at by his helmeted idiot of an apprentice. AND **THEN** , she was placed in a comfortable bed in some strange room and glimpses into her childhood that she thought she had buried a LONG time ago.

To top it all off, it felt as if a set of eyes were still observing her.

She was fed up.

Seraph was not going to continue being subjected to whatever nonsense was happening. She was going to find her droid and get the hell out of this circus.

However, her newfound resolve began to falter as she felt a strengthening, almost gravitational, pull tugging at her body to the other end of the room, sending static waves up and down her spine.

"Why is this bullshit happening," She whispered to herself as she brought her knees to her chest and buried her face into the tops of them.

"It is because the Force is stronger in you than most beings of this galaxy... And my Master wants to harness it.”

The familiar robotic voice grated at Seraph’s nerves.

Turning her head towards the sound, she began to take in her surroundings fully. The helmeted figure of Kylo Ren sat in a black leather recliner across from the large bed Seraph was perched on that was pushed against the room’s far wall. A small black single-legged table had been placed next to the recliner with a panel of controls lighting up its top. The shiny black walls and grey floor made the room feel cold. Despite that, as she laid eyes on Ren's sitting figure, an ember of warmth traveled through her body.

"You feel it too…"

Once his monotone words reached her ears, alarms began blasting in her skull. Trying to think rapidly, she fumbled developing a coherent sentences.

"Wait, w-what? What are you talking about? I could never feel anything for you besides hatred. You've done nothing but bring suffering to the solar system."

"I never specified what you were feeling nor if those feelings were directed towards me… Your lack of tact when responding to my statement has just eliminated any doubts I had about the connection between us."

 _  
'Goddammit, you are an IDIOT... You are more clever than this.'_ She chastised herself as she continued to scrutinize the sitting man.

The two sat silently, staring at each other for a few moments. All the while, a thirst to touch him in some way began to creep into her thoughts.

 _  
'What am I feeling towards this **thing**? Why do I want physical contact with a murderer?'_

"I have convinced my Master not to dispose of you by taking you on as my apprentice. I will train you in the ways of the Dark Side of the Force and you will become a vital weapon for the First Order in their quest to eliminate the Resistance and bring balance to the galaxy. Once your body heals more, we will start tra-"

The manic cackle that erupted from Seraph cut Ren's sentence short.

"What is so funny? you should be groveling at my feet with gratitude because I saved you and have given your life purpose."

She could tell he was frustrated by the way his modulated voice raised an octave. It took a few seconds to regain her composure and formulate a response, but when she did, the smile she had when laughing was still lingering on her face.

"You expect me, someone placed in this situation against her will, someone who still has NO idea where her friend is that you took, someone who knows ALL too much about your crazy war group from the destruction she observed across the galaxy, to go with what you just said and _thank_ you for it? I don't even know what you look like! You hide behind that stupid helmet thinking its intimidating. Hate to break it to you pal, but you look like an idiot."

Ren jumped up from the recliner with fists clenched. Anger radiated off of him in waves that Seraph could feel from across the room.

"How dare you speak to me like that. I am **your** Master now. You will respect me." he bellowed as he began to stomp towards her.

She sank back towards the wall as he approached, but she tried not to show too much fear as he drew nearer. With the distance closing between them, the burning within her body became overwhelming. 

She couldn’t withstand another second. 

The severe desire to touch him was becoming maddening. The potent longing for contact was something she had never felt before with anyone and was something she had no desire to experience anymore. It made her weak.

"Ok, I'm sorry, just stop! Don't get any closer to me." She spat while sticking her hand out towards Ren, willing him with everything she had to stop moving.

The tall man froze in his tracks amazed; Seraph seemed to have trapped his feet to the ground. She could see him trying to struggle free, sensing him trying to use the Force's power to release himself, but failing.

All traces of anger dissipated as his fists unclenched. 

"You have an enormous amount of untapped power; you stopping me like this proves it. Let me train you. I can make you more powerful than any being in the universe. Nothing will be able to stop you once you let the power of the Dark Side in. So, instead of telling you that you are my apprentice, I shall ask: Will you let me assist you in becoming the person you were meant to be? Will you let me help you fulfill your destiny?"

 _'My destiny? What does he know of that?'_ She brooded as she continued to hold Ren in place.

"I watched you as you slept, tossing and turning…. Crying out in fright… I saw your nightmare as it was forcibly projected into my mind… Saw your suffering… I, too, have suffered. But, with what I can teach you no one will ever be able to harm you again. That torment in the past will become a source of power. All would crumble before you. And when whatever enemies you've acquired over time try to harm you, I will destroy them by your side."

Something about the way he spoke those last words made her emotional barrier begin to crack. The rage she felt knowing Ren had invaded her thoughts shrunk as she processed everything. She could tell from how he spoke that he was trying to understand her on a deeper level. And that desire of understanding made her reluctantly trust him.

She could refuse and suffer the consequence…. OR let this being teach her some useful skills with the Force.

And then take her leave somehow. 

It was an offer she sadly could not refuse at this point.

"Ok… I might let you teach me… But…. I need to know who you are. Please… Take off that ridiculous helmet."

"As you wish."

Slowly, Ren raised both his hands to either side of the helmet. With a hiss, the faceplate began to move away from the rest of the headgear until he finally removed the thing in one peace. Free from any covering, he tucked the metal armor under his arm.

"Happy now?" The deep unaltered voice of Kylo Ren questioned sarcastically as locks of black hair tumbled down onto his shoulders. He narrowed his naked shining brown eyes on hers.

As their gazes locked without any barrier, the flame Seraph had felt inside for him turned into an uncontrollable inferno.


	6. Clear views

Without the helmet obscuring his view, Ren could see how drastically pale Seraph's skin was underneath her bruises. As she peered at him, the ceiling lights reflected off her so that she looked celestial. Eventually, she pulled her body to the side of the bed and dangled her legs over the edge with toes barely grazing the cold grey laminate floor. Seeing her unaltered before him, Kylo was taken aback by her feminine yet strong facial features. Her lips were a deeper crimson than he had observed behind his helmet, and the long tangled hair that fell around her face had flecks of natural browns intertwined with the vibrant red.

She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

"Where is my droid." Her words were icy.

"That chirping thing… yes. I.. I will get him for you."

He tried to move, but she had not released her grip on his feet.

"If you could?... I promise I will bring your friend to you. Just let me move?"

"Oh shit! Yeah, my bad, I don't know how to control this Force stuff properly… I'm sorry."

The squeezing around his toes began to slacken as Kylo felt her power receding. He had tried to release himself from her clutches multiple times using his own power, but somehow she completely overwhelmed him. No matter how hard he pushed, Seraph would not give in. And to top it all off, she didn't even notice him trying to escape. So how was it so easy to overpower her on Jakku?

Letting the thought continue to roll around in his head, Ren moved to the table next to the recliner and hit the intercom communicator button.

"Hux, bring the droid from Jakku to my quarters."

"I am not a slave you can summon whenever your heart desires, Ren." The venomous voice crackled through the intercom.

"I do not like repeating myself." Ren retorted, "Bring me the droid, or I will make sure the Supreme Leader knows of your insolence."

An awkwardness began to encase the room. Kylo clicked off communication and looked back towards the bed. After mentioning the Supreme Leader, Seraph had pushed herself against the wall and pulled her knees towards her chest, wrapping her arms around them once more. Her face turned to the side, and a vacant expression had taken over. It was not surprising to sense that she was fearful of the creature that tortured her. Guilt began to fill Ren as he thought how he should have never let his Master go as far as he did with her, but what was he supposed to do? Disobey Snoke?

Seeing the girl look so lost trigger Kylo to want to comfort her in some way, yet he couldn't bring himself to move closer to her. Nonetheless, He decided to take a risk and sit on the mattress's edge, a substantial distance from Seraph. He longed to reach out and pull her into an embrace, but he couldn’t; he was terrified of how she would react to his advances.

_  
‘What is happening to me? I have destroyed the things I have feared in the past…. Why am I frightened of this thief's reactions to me?’_

The thought sparked Ren's curiosity. What **did** she actually think of him?

He tried to nudge into her mind with the Force gently, but was disappointed when he found one thought repeating in her head like a mantra, " _Please don't let it happen again_." The peculiar cyclical thought overtook his anxiety, and he inched himself closer to her.

"What do you not want to happen again? I can assure you that the Supreme Leader will not harm in a way similar to what he did previously. Is that it?" Ren questioned as he gazed straight ahead. Facing her while he revealed that he had invaded her mind seemed too daunting of a task.

" **How dare you**."

The words were soaked in malice as they left her lips. Kylo knew he shouldn't have infringed on her barriers in such a way. While she was asleep, glimpsing into her dream was one thing; she had practically projected it into him. However, seeing Seraph’s reaction for his recent transgression made Ren feel as if it was a genuinely atrocious act to violate her mind when she was fully conscious. This moral twist was something entirely new to the Commander. He never felt guilty about entering someone's head before, but with her, it seemed like he was crossing a boundary that had been carefully established even before they met.

"As your new Master, I need to know what you are thinking and feeling. So tell me."

Kylo felt her eyes burning holes into the side of his face, but he refused to turn and look at her. They remained silent until the door of the room slid open, allowing entry to the rambunctious black and silver spherical droid that came screeching into the room faster than a podracer in The Boonta Eve Classic. Not long after, General Hux came barreling through the door, following the little thing out of breath and frowning.

The entire atmosphere in the room changed as soon as the girl set eyes on the rampaging robot. Ren could feel the Dark Side's oppression ever-present on the Supremacy be sucked out of the air.

The girl clambered off the bed and lowered herself to the floor, scooped up the machine into a hug. Violent trills and beeps continued erupting from the droid as Seraph squeezed it closer into her.

"I thought I lost you… I'm so sorry I didn’t listen to you. You think I would know to take your advice after all this time." She cooed while continuing to snuggle the robot.

"That ridiculous thing has not shut up since I powered it back on. It should have its memory wiped because that droid has a foul mouth and, somehow, is ruder than you, Commander Ren." The ginger-haired man indignantly stated as he continued trying to normalize his breathing. Listening to the man's voice, Seraph paused her stream of loving words to her friend and peered up at Hux with a puzzled expression on her face. 

"Thank you for taking care of him."

Snapping his head towards the girl, Kylo gawked at her in confusion. Take care of the droid? What did this imbecile do? Jealousy began to swell inside of him before Ren could stop it.

"B-Dubs tells me how you cleaned him before turning him back on and how you told him exactly where I was even though you were annoyed. Even giving him coordinates to my location. You truly didn't have to do any of that… You're a good man."

Hux's ears began to turn a deep shade of red, betraying the embarrassment that was hidden from his face.

Kylo became overcome with envy. 

"Get out **NOW.** " Ren yelled as he pushed the General out the door and into the hallway's wall using the Force, slamming the door shut once Hux crossed the threshold. The savage covetous he felt for the words Seraph said to the ginger overwhelmed his common sense and reason. 

Rising from the bed, he stared down at the girl, who was now in a frightened heap on the floor. He wanted to kick the metal ball of a droid out of her arms. He craved to destroy the bed she had laid on. He needed to kill something. Jamming his helmet back onto his head, he trudged to the closed-door before pausing. Standing still for a few seconds, he slowly turned his head to see her out of the corner of his eye, but his back was still towards her.

"You will stay here until you heal. There is a bathroom through the door to the right with clean clothes in there for you. Wash. Rest. We begin training the day after tomorrow. It is done."

With his head covered once more, Ren felt powerful. His face was unreadable behind the mask. He pried the door open and walked into the hallway, not looking back as he sealed the door shut on Seraph.


	7. Refreashing

The tantrum Ren threw before stomping out of the room caught Seraph entirely off guard. He had been so docile until she spoke to the man who brought BB-7W to her. A trace of some emotion had been sewn into the powerful anger that filled the room. Was it jealousy? Why would he be jealous of how she spoke to another person?

"This entire situation is completely fucked, B-Dubs. And I'm sorry to say this, but we will be staying here for a little while… At least until I figure out a more detailed plan of escape." 

Frustrated buzzing came up from the little bot after she finished her statement. 

"I know we need to leave as soon as possible, but I need to learn how to control my powers of the Force a little better before we do that. Ren has demanded I become his apprentice… And yes, we will get the hell out of here, but only after I have learned a few different techniques to help us not get killed in the process." 

A sad sigh came from the droid, followed by a string of questions asking about the events that had transpired since they last saw one another. Seraph tried to relay all she could remember to the droid, but the number of blanks within her memories began to irritate her. Finally, having enough of her friend's interrogation, she pushed herself off the floor and made her way to the door on the right wall of the room. 

"Look Dubs, I know you want to know what happened, but I'm not entirely sure of the events myself. The last thing I remember was a blinding pain before I woke up here. I want to get cleaned up and to sleep."

BB-7W grated some gears inside its spherical body, indicating he was annoyed with her, but Seraph's mind was already focused on something else. Or, more specifically, someone else. 

As soon as the Commander took off his helmet, she had been thrown completely off guard by his appearance. The scar etched down the right side of his face from his forehead to down past the collar of his high necked armor had filled her with worry and wonder. Dark circles were formed underneath his eyelids, betraying the fatigue and lack of sleep he must be experiencing. When she looked into his eyes, she felt as if she were drowning in the affliction that was nestled into the brown and honey color of his irises and wanted to do nothing more than to grab him into a comforting embrace. He was around her age, but his expression showed a person far older than his years; A person who has seen too much suffering and death. Heavy breaths had come from his gently parted scarlet lips as they formed into a pout underneath his large, yet fitting nose. 

He was devastatingly handsome. And He was tragically broken. More broken than even she was. 

Shaking her head in frustration, she pushed open the bathroom door. 

The black-walled bathroom was expansive. White floors strode forward, leading to a large glass-enclosed shower with multiple shower heads dropping down from the ceiling. A long white marble-like counter with a sink was left of her while the toilet was behind a closed door to the right. Finally realizing she could scrub all the blood, dust, and grim from her flesh, she giddily peeled off her ragged clothes and practically ran into the shower. 

Water cascaded from the ceiling in hot sheets as she stood and let all the grime wash away. On the Pack Rat there was a shower, but it was so small she could barely move her body without knocking something over or banging into something. Taking advantage of the facilities, she made sure to try every different soap from the dispensers on the wall and all the various settings of the showerheads. 

After what seemed like an hour, she reluctantly decided to leave the shower as exhaustion overcame her. While she had spent an ample amount of time unconscious, not much "rest" occurred during that time due to Snoke's torture and her nightmares. Heaving a dramatic sigh, she opened the glass enclosure door and wrapped herself in a plush white towel that was softer than anything she had ever felt. 

Finally walking to the counter, she examined the three piles of clothes beside the sink. One pile had a pair of baggy cargo combat pants with a long-sleeved crop top formed into a V neck with a couple of undergarments hidden between the two articles. She assumed this pile must be her training attire, and the thought startled her. 

The other piles of cloths contained men's black t-shirts and two pairs of black pajama slacks with women’s cheeky underwear placed between the layers again.

Her eyes fell back to the pile of training clothes, and her expression darkened.

_' I'm all for women dressing how they want and feeling comfortable showing off their bodies… But, he expects me to wear this? I have never worn anything so tight and revealing in my life.'_

"You should see the variety of coloration these people have in their clothing!" She sarcastically shouted down the hall to her droid as she assessed her options. How did Ren expect her to train in that outfit? Her mid-section would be exposed as a target, and she would be lucky if her breast would fit into the crop top without popping out. 

She slipped a pair of black underwear on and grabbed the men's t-shirt in the next pile. When she pulled it over her head, she became dizzy, smelling the mixture of mint, rosemary, and Ren's natural scent that was embedded into the shirt. Longing filled every inch of her. 

Yes, he had darkness emanating from him… Nonetheless, she felt something hidden deep inside him that was desperately trying to rip and claw its way out. Something light. She had been happy when he marched from her room, giving her some much-needed privacy, but somehow she missed his presence. 

She soon realized that the echoes of the Force user were silent, leaving her truly alone. 

_' I need to figure out what this is that is happening between us. When I woke up earlier, he gave away that he felt whatever it was too…"_

She didn't remember getting to the bed, but once there, she flopped stomach first onto the mattress and began to doze. Her left arm drifted off the bed as she slipped into sleep, and her droid inched itself underneath her hand, entering sleep mode as Seraph began to snore.


	8. Control

Ren fumed down the halls of the Supremacy until he reached an empty control room. Pacing, he took out his light saber and began to obliterate the keyboard panels until everything turned into a pile of burnt wires and sparks.

_'How DARE she speak to that dullard Hux with any form of compassion. Just because he did some mediocre work on her droid? HE IS NOTHING COMPARED TO ME!'_

Quietness fell over the room.

Appraising the damage he caused to the surroundings, reason finally re-entered Ren's brain. How could he let a girl, another scavenger girl to add insult to injury, get him so enraged. Whatever passion he felt for her had sent him into blind fury over something he should not have even cared about. And he needed to gain control. For one of the first times in his life he had to try and control his emotions instead of letting the anger flow through him freely. 

Yes, he had promised himself that he would not let her go.… However, he needed to destroy the emotional attachment creeping into him towards her before he lost control of himself completely. He had plans to take control of the First Order… To rid the galaxy of the Jedi… And if he failed to turn Seraph to the dark…. Snoke would force him to do away with her… 

The thought of having to destroy her made Ren sick. He could’t handle anything remotely similar to the agony he had experienced after his saber had entered his father’s abdomen again. 

_'Thinking that far ahead will do me no good. I must focus on turning her to the darkness. There is no other option.'_

Since he had let the girl stay in his quarters to rest, he made his way to the guest rooms where diplomats stayed whenever they happened to be on the Supremacy. The events of the day had exhausted him and before he could even process what his body was doing he had stripped down to his boxer briefs and laid in the bed within the guest room. 

The sleep that came was far from restful, the beginnings of the usual nightmares that continuously plagued Ren formed as he tossed and turned under the blanket.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

_Bodies of his fellow Jedi apprentices he slaughtered on Ahch-To were all around him. Former friends, kids he had played with and trained with, were cut down by his own hand and covered in thick rivulets of blood. Alarmed, he ran through the rain coming down in sheets to the closest sleeping hut. As he entered, he was greeted by a vision of his younger self dancing across the hut’s room tearing apart one student after another with his saber. Even though the kids were dead, his younger self continued to slam his lightsaber down onto the bodies, further mutilating the corpses and spraying blood everywhere. Ren tried to run up and stop his younger self, grabbing the shoulder of the enraged child and turning him. However, as he gazed into the face of his younger self the environment around them faded to blackness and his younger self began to morph into his father._

_Han Solo's eyes began to glisten as he reached his hand out to gently stroke his son's face. As Han's rough palm made contact with Ren's cheek, a look of pain and horror swept onto his face as a gaping hole burst into his abdomen from some invisible force._

_"NO!" Ren wailed in agony as he tried to catch his father's clasping body, but he had no control of his limbs._

_"Please father, forgive me." Ren spluttered as he sank to the ground, kneeling next to Han's bleeding body._

_A gruff cackle began to ring out in the blackness._

_"You have failed me for the last time. You’re so pathetic." Snoke's voice reverberated in Ren's grief stricken body._

_Han's bleeding body began to shrink and mold into the body of Seraph, yet the wound in the abdomen remained. Kylo let out a tormented wail as he regained control of his arms and pulled the girls limp body onto his lap. Her once bright grey eyes were dull as he stroked hair out of her cold face. The tears began to flow as he held Her lifeless body against his. The connection the Force had formed between them was now broken, leaving a vast pit of emptiness in his soul that was so complete he felt like his chest was caving in on itself._

_"Please, bring her back. I need her like I need air. I can't be without her. You can torture me, kill me, anything, just BRING HER BACK!" He begged as he rocked back and forth._

_Snoke's cold laugh echoed into the void once more, but it began to deepen into a type of chili cackle that Ren had never heard before yet seemed oddly familiar._

_"As you wish."_

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Letting out a yell, the Force user shot up from the mattress. He had awoken just as Snoke's light saber entered his chest in his dream. Shaking, he tried to regain composure as he pushed sweat soaked hair out of his face. 

He was no stranger to bad dreams, but whatever he had just experienced was no ordinary nightmare. He could still feel his father's hand against his cheek, the weight of Seraph's dead body on his legs, he could even feel a dull ache in his chest where Snoke's saber had pierced. 

Was this a sign for him to truly protect the girl? Was this some kind of image of the future? The nightmares filled with all those he murdered was nothing new, but Seraph's demise was a novel addition to the string of horrors he already experienced. Why was he so broken with her death? Why had she mattered so much to him in the nightmare?

Turning the questions over in his mind, Ren decided to get up for the day. Even though the dream had seemed to only last a total of ten minutes he had, in reality, been asleep for a few hours. After showering and donning his usual all black attire and masked helmet, he exited the guest room and walked towards the mess hall of the ship. Once entering the auditorium-like high ranking officer cafeteria he realized he was far from hungry, but he still grabbed a tray and piled it with the usual breakfast choices: eggs, sausage, and toast. After filling a cup with caf he decided to forgo sitting at the commander's table and bring the tray to Seraph. 

The girl probably hadn't eaten in a while, but any cook or servant could bring her a meal if he ordered them to. The truth of the matter was Ren wanted to see her with his own eyes. He wanted to make sure no harm had come to her in the time they were apart. 

As his feet carried him closer to his quarters where the girl resided, he could feel the Force connection they shared pulling at his insides. Once he stood outside the door, the desire to be close to her was almost driving him mad. Yet, he still was too nervous to enter the quarters.

With the emotions swirling inside of him, he could barely hold himself together. He had told himself before he would try and gain control, but the more he tried to reign himself in the more he lost his composure. These sensations were not unknown to him, but he had not felt anything besides anger, hatred, and loathsomeness since he left his mother and father to train with Luke Skywalker. 

After what seemed like an eternity, Kylo focused enough to knock on the door gently. 

No answer.

He knocked again, louder this time, but still no answer came from the other side.

 _'This is ridiculous, I am acting like a child. She is my apprentice and I am her Master. I will enter MY ROOM whenever I please.'_ Ren thought haughtily as he unlocked the door and entered the dark quarters.

A stillness lay over the room as he walked towards the middle of it. 

"Seraph, I have brought you some food. I expect you to eat if you are to heal." He barked into the darkness, but no response came. 

Using the Force, he turned on a light near the chair he had sat upon the first time the girl woke. As the room began to brighten he caught his breath and almost dropped the tray he was holding. 

The girl was laying on her stomach with the bed almost still made. One arm was hanging off the mattress, resting on top of her droid while the other arm pulled a pillow underneath her head, which was turned to the side towards him. Since she had laid on top of the bed, no blankets or sheets covered her body. His black t-shirt she had donned was riding up, exposing the small of her back. The underwear she wore that perfectly shaped her backside, allowed a glimpse of the bottom of her checks. As a stunned Kylo moved closer he could see the bruises that decorated her legs and arms, but that did not take away from her beauty whatsoever. Before he could stop himself he had placed the tray on the ground and was reaching towards her face. He pushed tendrils of hair off her cheek and felt his heart almost burst as his leather gloved hand brushed her skin. Unable to look at her peaceful face any longer, he averted his gaze towards her body and felt a tightening in the groin of his pants as he examined all her curves.

Black markings could be seen on the bottom of her back where the shirt was rising up. This intrigued Ren and against his better judgement he used the Force to gently tug up the back of her shirt up to further expose the markings.

Scars forming slightly raised lines and curves of discolored skin were all over her back and legs. Some were long with healed twisted tissue betraying how deep the wound had been, while others were thin and barely noticeable. He wondered what else this girl had been through until he lost all thought taking in her tattoo. 

Thick lines created Isosceles triangles merging into one another forming into four overlapping rhombi that fell into a line down her spine from the bottom of her hairline to were her low-rise underwater began. More triangles made up of thinner lines filled and repeated themselves inside the rhombi with bold lines zig zagging along the edges. On the four free corners of the rhombi on either side of her spine, spirals began and expanded out of the points connecting and intertwining with one another. Ren had never seen such a strange and captivating work of geometric art. 

She was the most gorgeous creature he had ever laid eyes on.

He had to get away from her.

Already feeling like he immensely violated her privacy, Kylo knew he could barely control the lust beginning to eat at him and could not continue gazing at her beauty.

As he took steps backwards trying to peel his eyes away from the resting girl, squeals began to erupt from the floor. Ren looked down and saw the round droid beginning to jerkily advance towards where he was standing. 

It seemed extremely angry.

Ren practically ran out of the room once he turned from Seraph's sleeping body.


	9. Rise and Shine

Seraph groggily woke from her slumber completely disoriented. It took her a few seconds to remember where she was, but once she did, the panic from before ebbed back into her body. Thankfully BB-7W was already awake and nuzzling her hand that was hanging off the side of the bed, which prevented her from falling into a full-blown panic attack. Taking a moment to center herself, she continued to lay on her stomach, trying to figure out how long she had been asleep. 

The masculine scent of Ren lingered on the shirt she was wearing, causing her heart quicken as she breathed him in. 

She hated it. 

Suddenly, BB-7W beeped and indicated that there was a tray with a plate of food placed on the floor beside the bed. 

"Wait, someone came into the room? Did you see who it was?"

Irritated chirps from the droid conveyed that Ren himself and brought her the meal, but quickly left after placing everything on the floor. Of course, he only left after he sat on the bed and stared at her for an uncomfortably long time. 

Seraph had not even budged when Ren entered the room. This slightly alarmed her since normally she was a light sleeper, only getting small amounts of rest here or there while always waking when anyone drew near. She decided to ignore the comments BB-7W had made about Ren eyeing her; whatever he was doing left no impact.

"Anything good down there?" Seraph grumbled to B-dubs with her face buried in the pillow. 

The droid replied with crackles.

"So… Maybe?"

She crawled to the edge of the bed, grunting from pain in the process, and began to scrutinize the plate. A cup of cold caf was next to a plate of eggs, sausage, and toast. The fact she was given real food instead of some kind of synthetic protein bar or leftover scraps caught her off guard. This gesture of kindness was something she had not expected from Ren after he stormed out of the room the last time they spoke. He was a person that was fueled solely on raw emotion and probably did not forgive or forget things too easily, so him providing actual sustenance for her that looked somewhat appetizing was a little shocking.

Her stomach growled and her mouth watered as the smell from the meal finally hit her nostrils, and within seconds she had leaped from the bed and grabbed the plate. She sat crossed-legged on the floor as she shoveled the food into her mouth with her hands. It had been at least two days since Seraph had eaten anything. 

After chugging the caf, she sat satisfied with BB-7W nestled into her side. Contentment filled her as she stared at the door across the room. However, the feeling did not last long; restlessness started to settle in. So, Seraph began to meander down the hall leading to the bathroom and after taking another shower, she eyed the clothing set out for her on the countertop suspiciously. 

_'I cannot believe that I am expected to wear this crap. I'll look absolutely ridiculous. No one wants to see that much of my skin,'_

After exploring the entire bathroom to see if other clothes were hidden somewhere, Seraph finally gave in and pulled on the clothing. The long-sleeved black v-neck crop top and baggy black cargo pants that tapered and became skin-tight after the mid-calf flattered her figure but made her self-conscious. Once she tightened the combat-style utility built around her hip, she gazed into the mirror and evaluated herself.

The entire outfit was too revealing. While only a scant amount of cleavage and mid-drift was actually exposed, it was more skin than she had ever shown in any situation where she wasn’t by herself or intimate with another person. Half of the points and lines of her geometric tattoo were completely uncovered, making her angry that anyone on the ship could see something so personal. 

Then she finally noticed how truly horrific she looked.

The first time she showered, she had been too mentally unfocused to notice what had happened to her, but now as she further scrutinized the outfit, she was all too aware of the damage that she had been dealt. 

Her pale skin was speckled all over with bruises that were changing from purple to a sickly greenish-yellow, making her look ill. The cut above her eyebrow was beginning to heal, and her nose returned to a semi-normal shape even though it hurt like hell from being broken, but both areas still looked angry and were throbbing. A purple hue covered the right side of her face, and when she moved closer to the mirror, she could see that blood vessels had burst in her right eye, making the sclera almost entirely red. 

"Holy shit."

It took a minute for Seraph to take in everything and accept what happened. She felt like crying as she looked into her own eyes. She had been beaten and tortured in her past but never had acquired such damage like this before. 

To distract herself, she scrambled around trying to find a brush, and thankfully, she was successful. Beginning to detangle the knots in her mid-back length hair, she made sure to stay far away from the mirror. The process absorbed most of her attention since she had to move slowly and deliberately not to hurt herself. Finally, after putting her hair in a braid Seraph walked back into the bedroom and moved towards the room entrance. 

"I'm already tired of this room, aren't you Dubs?" She questioned over her shoulder as her droid rolled to her heels. 

"Let's do some exploring!" 

Of course, the ever so masterful Kylo Ren had made sure Seraph could not escape the quarters she was in until he allowed it. Over and over, she punched different codes into the door keypad trying to hack and unlock it, but continued to fail. Claustrophobia began to seep into her veins as she tried to pull on the side of the door, hoping it would release. Eventually, getting so frustrated, she pulled her arm back and began to pound on the metal and kick it. Suddenly, the door swiftly opened, letting out a low hiss, and before she could stop herself, her fist collided into the center of Kylo Ren's chest.


	10. Uncontroled Anger

Her eyes grew wide as she realized what she had just done. Backing up slowly, Seraph lifted her gaze towards Kylo Ren's. Easily over six feet tall, his looming figured blocked the entire doorway, and she had to take steps back to see his entire frame truly. Her 5-foot 4-inch stature compared to Ren’s height made her feel minuscule and frail.

While she had some fear for the man, the small amount of trust he had teased from her the other day still held. And as they looked at one another, measuring each other up and down, the pull towards him, that leaped to life as soon as she collided with him only increased. Affection towards the man was beginning to establish itself in her core.

That is until she noticed Ren’s first clenched at his side, shaking.

“Why are you so ** _LOUD_**!?” 

The words exploded from his masked face with such force Seraph gasped in shock. 

“I don’t… what do you mean? I’ve only been talking to Dubs and - “

**“YOUR THOUGHTS. YOUR FEELINGS. I CAN SENSE YOUR ANXIOUS ENERGY! YOUR PANIC! I CAN FEEL EVERYTHING FROM ACROSS THE DAMN SHIP.”**

Seraph absorbed what he said in silence. She cast her eyes to the ground, unable to truly comprehend what Ren was saying as she stood frozen in the middle of the room.

As she continued to stare at the floor, he walked into the room, using the Force to slam the door, and tore his helmet off to reveal a flushed expression. He then threw his helmet across the room, letting it slam into and crack the black wall with a sickening crunch.

The throw did nothing to dampen his rage; he barged past Seraph’s stiff body towards the bed and began tearing at the sheets and yelling in exacerbation.

Seeing Ren’s fury, BB-7W let out an alarming whistle and rolled itself down the hall towards the bathroom as quickly as it could.

Any trust Seraph had in this man-child flittered into nothing. Revulsion began to grow in place of any affection that may have seeded itself in her towards him. She may be an involuntary-apprentice for the time being, but she refused to continue feeling helpless, frail and intimidated. The only time she had ever felt as pathetic as she did on the Supremacy was in the basement of her home planet for the years of torture. And she refused to let herself continue to fall into that feeling again, even if it killed her. 

Eventually, the yelling stopped. 

Letting out a sigh, Seraph turned and faced Ren as he stood by the bed panting and sweating. She bore her eyes into his, dissecting why he had this foolish tantrum. The longer she looked, the more she realized his eyes betrayed a type of pain that his face was trying to hide.

_‘Or maybe our Force connection is deepening?’_

“Are you done?” 

She could tell the harshness of her tone took him by surprise, but he just nodded once and collapsed onto the side of the bed and buried his face into his hands. 

Pity began to swell in her, but it did not overpower the anger that was firmly rooted in her gut since she saw Ren’s fists. Nonetheless, she could not stop her body’s longing to comfort him. The Force connection between them was almost too much to control, but she resisted by crossing her arms and gritting her teeth so hard her jaw hurt. 

“Now, will you please explain to me what this asinine tantrum was about?”

Not raising his head out of his hands, Ren answered in a hoarse quiet voice.

“Your thoughts, your emotions, I could feel them all since you awoke. I tried ignoring them first; then, I started letting myself experience the slim moment of contentment you had earlier. But the longer you were awake, the more pain and dread I felt emanating from you. It was so overpowering I couldn’t even hear my own thoughts. I had to come to you. To make you shut up. And the closer I came to where you reside, the more I felt the apprehension and sadness. I… I felt like it was crushing me.” 

The last words came out in a whisper.

“Well, what about now? Are you still _overwhelmed_ with my emotions?”

Seraph hadn’t meant for what she said to sound sarcastic, but she couldn’t help herself. She was proud of how in check her emotions had been for all that she had been through. 

“How dare you speak to me like that. I’m a commander in the First Order, a Knight of Ren...  
And most importantly, I am your Master. **You’re nothing but street trash**.”

Ren raised his head to look at her with indignation, but his face quickly changed to anguish at how he spoke to her. She could feel his regret burning into her, but she refused to let this quell her frustration.

“No, _master_ , how dare you speak to me like that. When I woke up the other day with you in this room, you were all about letting no harm fall on me, you seemed so… human… now this? No. If you want respect, you need to earn it.” 

Suddenly the air was sucked out of Seraph’s lungs. Her throat clamped shut as she fell to her knees, gasping. Ren was above her now, teeth bared with an arm outstretched using the Force to suffocate her.

Frantic beeps and whales came from her droid as it zoomed out of the bathroom and began to slam into Ren’s legs trying to break his concentration. 

Just as darkness began to invade her sight, oxygen was able to enter her lungs as Ren released her and staggered backward, starring at his hands as if they just turned into Rathtar tentacles.

On her hands and knees, Seraph coughed and gagged, clambering to breath. 

“I’m… I’m so sorry…. I can’t control myself.” 

Seraph began to lift herself off the floor, feeling any last bit of kindness she may have harbored for Ren shatter.

“I’m sick of this shit.”

“What do you -“

“Since you abducted me from Jakku, I have been tortured and violated and told what to do. I’m sick of it. I’m sorry for whatever I caused you to feel before your outburst, but _believe_ me it was unintentional. And honestly, I don’t know why you were feeling all that shit anyway. The only thing I was remotely upset about was how I’m essentially one giant bruise covered by scraps of fabric. And by the way, why **the FUCK** would you give me this to train in. I mean, seriously, my midsection, half my chest, and half my back are exposed. How is that ok?”

Ren stood in shameful, astonished silence.

“It’s… it’s to make you feel exposed… to make you feel like your vital parts are out and the open and are an easy target, making you subconsciously focus on protecting them more.”

“Seriously? I’m on a ship literally filled with psychopaths.”

After Seraph’s last words, they both stood cross-armed and gawking at each other in the middle of the room. BB-7W had rolled itself behind Seraph, but it did not let out a sound in fear of making Ren angry again. 

Eventually, Ren looked away, and Seraph let out a sigh followed by a question. 

“Well, since you’re here now, can you show me the ship, or can we train or something?” 

“You have only healed for a day; I do not want to engage you in a way that can harm you physically -“

“Hate to break it to you _Master_ , but you already engaged me physically in a way that causes harm.” She interrupted, pointing at her neck. “ I’m here, I’m standing, I’m awake, and I’m ready.”

Seraph could tell her statement flustered ren, but she was right. There was no point in making her wait another day to train. 

“Fine... Follow me. We shall go to the training hall, and we will begin with some basic hand-to-hand combat.” He grumbled, looking like a petulant child.

“Thank you _Master_ , but I am proficient in many forms of hand-to-hand and weapon combat… Maybe we work on ways to help me control the Force? So whatever happened today won’t happen again?”

“Seraph, I need to see how good you actually are with hand-to-hand combat. What you will be fighting against in the future is different than anything you’ve probably faced before. I must make sure you can protect yourself physically first before we move onto protecting yourself with the Force.”

Hearing Ren speak her name made her blush. The pull between them resurfaced with a vengeance, sparking her to want to feel his skin.

Seraph took a step towards Ren and placed her hand gently on one of his crossed forearms. A pulsing heat seemed to flow back and forth from the point of contact. Both their eyes fell to her hand placement and remained. 

Neither of them moved. 

“Please, Ren, try and calm down around me and communicate with me before your fury overtakes your reason. I need your help with learning the ways of the Force… I don’t want to fail.”

The raw emotion behind her statement caught both of them off guard.

“I will try my best… Now follow me.”

Leaving BB-7W behind, Ren placed his masked helmet back onto his head. And after placing her calf-high combat boots on, both Seraph and he walked out of the room and down the hall. 

As they made what seemed like random lefts and rights down hallways, Seraph could not help a thought from repeating in her head;

_I will not survive this stay._


	11. Shame

As Seraph followed some distance behind him, Ren could sense all her emotions towards him and he felt horrible because of it. 

He had tried to control himself, tried to be calm, but after she accidentally hit him when he opened the door to her quarters, Kylo could not keep the lid on his rage anymore. Everything erupted at once within him. But, she wasn’t afraid and she spoke her mind… Even showed kindness towards him.

And he choked her for it. 

So her angry curses towards him, her damnations of him, all the abhorrence she was directing at him was well deserved.

Making the hatred Ren felt for himself only grow. He didn’t even think that was possible anymore. 

Since the girl took residence in the Supremacy, his sense of the Force had become disorganized and heightened. It was like Seraph was a power cell charging him with energy, but he had no clue how to harness all the extra power and turn it into something productive. His mind was clouded, and the only light singling through the fog was the pull he felt towards her. 

Finally, their dirge through the halls ended as they reached the training room.

When Ren opened the door and ushered Seraph in, he could discern a shift in her emotions. 

_‘Is she… Excited?’_

The training center was huge. The black floors were made of springy mats that absorbed falls. An entire wall was covered with mirrors, so a person’s form could be observed when practicing fighting movements or lifting the range of free weights situated in the back corner of the room. Other training equipment, punching bags, and weight machines took up one-fourth of the room and about half the mirrored wall, but the rest of the center was open space. 

Seraph walked a few steps deeper into the room tentatively. Ren let her take in the surroundings, noting how stunning it was as her eyes lit up with eagerness when sweeping over everything the center held. He wished he could stare at her like this until space and time collapsed, yet he knew he had to break the silence otherwise he feared the Force pull towards her would become too overpowering.

“The Generals and squad leaders often run battle simulations and large classes for our Storm Troopers in here. However, they have been relocated to other training centers on the ship so I can focus on your training free from distractions.”

With a hiss, he took off his helmet and detached the hooded cape from his black uniform. Without the obstruction of the face mask, Ren could take in how electrifying Seraph’s smile truly was as she turned to him.

“Ben, this is amazing.” 

When She spoke the name his parents gave him, it felt like a knife to the gut.

“What… What did you just call me?”

“… I said Ren, Right?”

“No Seraph, you said Ben. I have never said that name around you before. How did you know that was my name before Kylo Ren!?” He demanded to know as he strode towards her.

Instinctively she took steps back out, causing sorrow to take hold of him. Kylo hadn’t realized how much it would hurt seeing her fear him, even if it was subconsciously. For the first time in his life, the Commander thought he had to get his anger under control. 

“I honestly don’t know why that name came to me… I just… Felt it? I just knew that was your real name, and it flowed off my tongue naturally.”

“Never call me that name again. Ben is dead. Kylo Ren is the only thing remaining in this shell of a body.”

Silence once again created a void between them. 

Suddenly, Seraph sat on the ground and began removing her combat boots. 

“Look, we are here to train, right? So let’s get to it. The sooner I show you that I can hold my own in hand-to-hand combat, the sooner we can get to the good stuff.”

As she spoke lazily, she looked at Ren with a smile. It was a friendly, peace offering type smile, and Ren could not stop his heart from racing. 

“Fine, we shall train… Just tell me, why are you taking off your boots?”

Oddly, he could not tear his eyes away from her legs. Free of boots and socks, Ren’s attention was centered on the girl’s big toes on either foot. Both looked as if they had been stomped on repeatedly until they were crushed. The healed and mangled nubs that remained were lack nails. Why hadn’t he noticed them before? Hearing Seraph let out a small cough, he reluctantly pulled his eyes away from the girl’s feet and looked into her face. 

There was a small smirk playing at her lips as she laughed out a daring statement. 

“I don’t want to hurt you.”

“You think you can hurt me?”

“I don’t think I can, I know I can, so don’t hold back, ok?”

Ren snorted in response to her pompous attitude. However, he soon realized she was radiating confidence through their connection. 

“Let’s get this show on the road, shall we?” Seraph chuckled as she sat cross-legged. 

“As you wish.”

With that, Ren ran towards the girl while she remained on the floor. He went in for a kick, but she quickly back rolled and jumped to her feet in one swift motion. Advancing towards her new location, Ren threw punch after kick after punch, and she blocked all of them with inhuman speed. In the process of blocking, she bobbed and weaved in different directions, making him expend more energy than he normally would when going in for attacks. Using the Force, he tried to sense what her next move was or if she would give him an opening to strike, but he could not discern anything. He had to rely on skill alone, which was something he had not done in years.

At first, every time they touched, he ached to feel her against his skin rather than through the cloth that covered his arms. But the more she continued to block and dodge his advances, frustration began to drown out his desires. 

After a half-hour of their none stop battle, Seraph jumped back and stuck Ren’s back as he turned through his kick then ran out of his reach. 

“Are you satisfied? Have I shown you I don’t need any of this hand combat training bullshit?”

Ren turned to Seraph and watched as her chest heaved. Sweat had completely soaked her crop top, further accentuating her curves. Fly-away hairs stuck up from her disheveled braid and her eyes gleamed with a searing passion. Her exposed and scarred mid-section glistened, and he couldn't help but become aroused as he looked at her. Plenty of women had turned him on before, but the attraction he was feeling for Seraph was so strong it blurred his senses.

He wanted to rip his hair out; his feelings vexed him so.

“You are good, but you still haven't beat me, girl. We move to different training when you can do that.”

The statement was completely false, but he was so frustrated by fighting he was determined not to let their training progress. Ren was being bested by a scavenger, AGAIN, and the anger he harbored because it interfered with his mindset. 

Seraph shrugged. 

“It’s you’re funeral, _Master_.”

As soon as the words left her lips, Seraph bolted forward. Ren tried to punch, but she blocked his arm from the outside and pivoted out from in front of his body. In an instant, Seraph latched onto the arm she had just blocked and used Ren’s continued punching momentum to lift her body, fling one of her legs over his head, and then latch her ankles together. With her calves locked around his neck, her body formed a 90-degree angle from Kylo's own for a nanosecond. Before he even realized what was happening, she continued using the power of their combined movements to spin Ren over himself with her legs still firmly locked around his neck. As he slammed onto his back, Seraph held strong with her ankles and landed on the ground catching herself in a low push-up position. 

The Commander could not comprehend what just took place. 

As he tried to let out a scream in frustration, the legs around his neck twisted, choking him before a squeak of sound could escape. 

The more he tried to hit, turn, get up, or even move Seraph with the Force, the tighter the grip around his neck became. The girl had the extraordinary physical strength to keep his body remaining in the compromised position. She was also using the Force to keep him trapped. Ren's anger started to give way to a sensation he had not felt in eons: panic. The dread from the lack of control in the fighting situation terrified him, deepening the hysteria that was suddenly coursing through his veins and threatening to rip him apart at any second. 

Soon his vision slowly began to fade. 

Suddenly, the legs around his neck loosened and were removed. As his eyesight returned, Ren took gasping breaths of air. His heart felt like it was going to crash through his rib cage. It was pounding so hard. 

Remaining on his back, Kylo turned his head towards Seraph. She was sitting about ten feet away with her arms and legs crossed, wearing a look of both pleasure and insolence on her face. 

“Now, you know how it feels.” 

Kylo continued to lay in silence with his thoughts firing at light speed. He mainly felt irritated towards her, but he refused to let his anger control his emotions around her now. He was beginning to realize that whatever relationship they had was not some fly-by interaction; Ren needed to cultivate a bond with her instead of driving her away with rage. While she could learn a lot from him, there was plenty he could learn from her. There was a reason the Force brought them together. 

_‘How did this space witch do this? Why was I unable to sense her movements during our fight, yet this morning her emotions overwhelmed me? What is she doing to me!?’_

Ren knew he had to say something. He couldn’t take the repugnant look on her face any longer.

“I am sorry for what I did this morning, Seraph. You had every right to do as you did. On top of that, I should have listened to you in regards to your ability to fight. You continue to place your trust in me, and yet I did not do the same. Tomorrow we will train with the Force.”

Her expression softened with a hint of surprise and compassion following his apology and she stood up. Eventually, the girl began to walk over to his supine body and reached her hand out in a gesture to help him stand. 

“Come on; I’m sure you want your room back… So why don’t you show me where I will be staying long term. This way, you don’t have to deal with me in your bed any longer.”

A soft chuckle escaped Ren's lips as he take off his gloves and rolled up his sleeves. He was hot and soaked in sweat, making Seraph's idea of going back to his own quarters ideal so he could shower. 

Propping himself up onto his elbows, he grabbed Seraph’s hand that was reaching out. When their skin came into contact, thin lines of blue sparks instantly webbed out across their clasped hands and a heat burned in their palms that was intense that it felt like Ren’s hand was on fire; yet, he could not let go. Static electricity began to sizzle in the air, and when Seraph tried to pull back, a shock wave pulsated from their bodies that so strong it knocked over some of the equipment in the training center. 

Then everything was calm. 

Seeing the frightened look on Seraph’s face, Ren released her hand, and she promptly yanked it away. They both gaped at each other, scared but exhilarated. He pushed himself off the floor and moved in front of Seraph. They stood so close that their bodies almost touched, but he could feel her gently keeping him from advancing with the Force. 

“Kylo… I don’t know what just happened… but, I can’t do that again right now… I know you feel it too… The insatiable need to have contact in some way with one another… it’s just all too overwhelming for me at this moment, and I just need to take a step back and think about what's happening to me. Too much has changed in my life in the last few days.” 

Seraph sounded so defeated as she spoke. Ren couldn’t help feeling as if he were melting at her soft words were heard.

_‘She has so much light in her.’_

Yet the dark in Ren wanted to take her right then and there. A tightening in the groin of his pants made him realize this was the second time she had unintentionally made him lust for her so deeply. It was such a deep primal need he never experienced before. And even though she had bested him in fighting and made him feel ashamed of his behavior, he was not upset. Any annoyance he held for her before, during, and just after their combat training had been converted into desire. 

It was addicting.

_‘I can’t handle this. I have to get away from this witch.’_

“Are you ok?”

The question from Seraph knocked Kylo back to reality. He quickly turned and walked towards the training room door. 

“Hey! What the hell are yo -.”

“General Hux will show you and your droid to your new quarters, so just wait here. I have pressing matters I must attend to.” Ren shouted over his shoulder as he dashed out of the room. He could hear Seraph’s shouts after him, but he couldn’t withstand being around her any longer. He had to free himself before he did something he regretted to the thief.


	12. Cold Water

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little NSFW action.

Bursting into a Storm Trooper's communal locker room near the training center, Ren made a b-line towards the showers. Thankfully all the areas were clear of personal so he did not have to scream at anyone to leave as he ripped his clothes off. He jumped into the nearest shower and turned the dial to the coldest it could go, hoping it would calm him down… But, it did not help.

He stood in the small shower stall with his hands on the wall and his back hunched towards the icy water that cascaded from the showerhead. 

As he closed his eyes, images of Seraph’s chest rising up and down as she panted kept flashing before them. 

His manhood was so stiff it was beginning to ache. 

_‘I have to do something... I can’t let this happen at random times when I see her... I’m her Master…. She would never want me after what Snoke and I have done... After what a bastard I’ve made out of myself….’_

Anger seeped into his muscles with the cold water until Ren has a revolution. 

Unable to take his want for Seraph any longer, he succumbed to his desires. Ren wrapped his large hand around his member and began to stroke himself. It had been years since he had pleased himself, and he was disgusted with himself for doing such an act, but he needed to have some kind of release before he shattered. 

As he pumped, he continued to imagine Seraph’s sweat glistening body. 

He began to work his hips into his hand, finding a rhythm to where his pumping arm and thrusting hips could work in tandem bringing him closer to his climax. 

After increasing the intensity of his working arm, Ren put his free hand on the back of his neck and leaned into the flowing water, letting out grunts and small moans as it poured over his entire body.

As he moved the hand from his neck to wipe his face free of water, he caught the slight scent of Seraph’s sweet and savory body that his fingers had picked up. Her smell had become trapped in the nape of his neck from their close contact fighting. 

The surprise and intensity of his climax due to Seraph's aroma rocked Ren’s body. He let out a loud moan followed by her name as waves of pleasure released from his manhood. The orgasm seemed to continue forever as he reached a state of euphoria. 

And then nothing was left in him but emptiness as he realized how truly alone he was. 

He was isolated in a freezing shower after touching himself to a woman he despised for making him feel so weak and powerless but was also intrigued by because she was so unique. She made him experience emotions he never thought existed, and she awoke feelings in him that he thought were dead. And he was horrible to her. Pushing her away by his actions and harm, but trying to pull her close using their connection. The entire relationship on his end was toxic and manipulative. 

Part of him felt like it wasn’t entirely his fault… She was sarcastic, foul-mouthed, and lacked respect for him, which did not help control his temper towards her. 

But she also was kind. Seraph may have already hated him before the training center, yet she made efforts to try and make peace with him so they could work together towards a common goal. 

His nerves felt frayed around her. The pull he maintained to her from the Force made all his senses haywire. 

Ashamed of his actions, Ren sank to his knees and let the water beat down upon him.

The emptiness in him seemed to be expanding into a black hole, sucking in every thought of happiness and leaving him with nothing but the cold hatred he harbored for himself. 

He eventually could not tell where the water from the shower stopped, and his tears began.


	13. Understanding

Seraph paced the length of the training center, waiting for General Hux. Fear of sending Ren into another outrage kept her from finding her own way to whatever quarters she was supposed to be stationed at, but after lingering in the room for what seemed like over a half-hour, her patience was running thin.

Eventually, the training room door slid open and Hux meandered in, letting out a slit cough to alert Seraph of his presence. She had resigned herself to meditating on the floor, trying to concentrate on controlling her connection with the Force, yet sadly after many failures in trying to move her unworn boots from one location to another she welcomed Hux's awkward manifestation.

"Space Vermin, I mean.. Er… Ms. Seraph... I am here to show you to your new living quarters. Follow me." 

As the general spoke, she noticed his ears turning red as she looked into his face. 

"You seem on edge. What's going on?" Seraph questioned as she got up from the floor and tucked her boots under her arm.

"I am not 'edgy.' I just do not like being a slave to Ren. I would rather do anything than being required to escort trash like you."

"Huh… Well, aren't you lucky? Please, lead the way."

She gestured and sarcastically bowed to the door, indicating she was ready to follow his direction. Instead of moving, Hux continued to stare at her with wary curiosity. Eventually, he turned on his heel and began to pace down the hallway with Seraph close behind.

They walked in utter silence, but she felt the urge to say something to break the anxious tension between them.

"General, I Just wanted to thank you again for caring for BB-7W. That droid is one of the only friends I have. I wish there were some way I could repay you -."

"Enough. I did what I thought was in my best interest, not _yours_. No repayment is necessary."

After Hux's abrupt statement, they went back to their quiet dirge through the ship. Seraph began to feel irritation gnawing at her insides. She knew there was a reason the General was acting so strange towards her, yet she could not figure it out by his external stony façade. 

Deciding to take a daring risk, she began to extend her mental reach with the Force into Hux's mind to read what he may be thinking. She knew how it felt to be on the receiving end of this treatment thanks to Ren, so trying to analyze the skill somehow and utilize it shouldn't be that hard, Seraph thought.

As she slowly penetrated Hux's thoughts, all she could sense was fear: Fear of her. However, it wasn't from her fighting skills or her mysterious Force connection with Ren. Hux was hesitant with her because she was a Force user in general. This revelation caused her to make an abrupt stop. 

"General, why are you so afraid of me being Force-sensitive? If I'm not mistaken, your boss is one of those." 

The words drifted from her lips in a whisper. She had many humans and creatures dread interacting with her due to the abrasive reputation among the Outer Rim and Uncharted Areas of the Galaxy. But this wasn't the case with the genera; Hux was a military man and didn’t have a clue about her status in space. He only knew she had the Force, which was a tidbit of information a minimal number of beings knew. Only her droid, an ex-boyfriend flyboy/pilot who she dated for a few years, and the few people within the First Order knew of her powers other than her family.

The general ceased walking and turned. His entire face lit up crimson as fury gleamed in his eyes. 

"I'll tell you why, it's because your kind do things like **THAT** , Ms. Seraph. You are just like Kylo Ren and Supreme Leader Snoke. You use your abilities to control and manipulate those around you. Having two unstable megalomaniacs in the First Order is more than enough. I can barely keep things afloat as it. **WE DO NOT NEED ANOTHER**."

Hux was panting when he finished. He must have realized that he let rage take the wheel of his emotions because soon, he was bracing himself for some kind of physical impact or punishment.

 _'This man is preparing himself for penance as if it were something that occurred every time he spoke out… I have heard awful things about the First Order in my travels, but how messed up is this organization on the inside if one of its top generals, who adores it, is afraid to speak his mind?'_ Seraph pondered as she looked at the ginger-haired man.

"I'm sorry you think I'm going to be another unstable megalomaniac like that thing Snoke and Bi-Polar Ren, but I can assure you, I'm not like them."

With a humph, Hux turned around and continued his zig-zagging pathway through the halls of the Supremacy. 

After what seemed like hours, they reached a corridor that looked familiar to Seraph, and she soon realized that the room they were passing was Kylo Ren's. A shiver rolled through her body as she felt the other Force-user's presence behind the metal walls. In her distraction, she did not realize Hux had stopped, and she ran into his back with her head still turned towards Ren's room. Once again, he let out an unpleasant hum as she stumbled back from him and mumbled a small apology with her head down. 

"Your room will be next to the commander's so that he may keep an eye on you. These are the Supreme Leader's orders." Hux declared with a scoff as he pushed open the door.

The room seemed to be a mirror image of Ren’s. Seraph walked into its center with a grin from ear to ear. She never expected to have a living space of this size all to herself.

_'Yeah, I miss my Pack Rat… Nonetheless, I could get used to having this nice ass bed and so much space to move.'_

As her thoughts wandered, BB-7W came burst from the bathroom hallway, skidding its way to her, spewing excited beeps.

"Ah! You have your own charging station? This place really is an upgrade from our old rust bucket, huh, Dubs?"

As Hux walked into the hallway and was about to close the door, Seraph rushed to him and gently placed her hand on his forearm. Even though his crisp black First Order uniform covered his skin, he reacted as if she touched him with a hot iron.

"Please, don't be afraid of me… You have every right to be upset with me invading your mind. I'm sorry I did that… And I understand hating someone like me when the only other people you have been exposed to who use the Force are… well, temperamental. Still, I will try my damnedest not to be like that with you. I promise to not use the Force on you anymore unless it is aiding you in some way. I know what it feels like to live with some form of apprehension daily, and I can assure you I don't want to cause that to anyone except my enemies. And after what you did for my Dubs without even knowing me, you will never be an enemy to me, Hux."

The General gazed at her with his lips pressed together so tightly they were disappearing. She gentle squeezed Hux's forearm as she continued to ramble on.

"I want there to be an understanding between us. We do not need to be friends. However, I do need allies on this ship. I have none except my droid."

"What about your precious Ren?" Hux spat pointedly

"Ren is my 'master,'' The words felt tainted as they left her mouth. “ That doesn’t mean he is an ally. If he had the chance, he would rip me apart and blast my remains through the airlock. I'm honestly surprised he hasn't yet… Anyway, that's beside the point. Will you accept me as a comrade and not some maniac obsessed with the Dark Side?"

The corner of Hux's mouth slightly turned upwards as he eyed Seraph with amused puzzlement. Seeing the beginnings of a grin from the stern soldier triggered a toothy grin to blossom across her face as she crossed her arms triumphantly.

_'I know this man has killed, I know he has darkness in him… But, he is also trying to survive this situation just like I am. I need to have him on my side to help me escape potentially.'_

Suddenly and without expectation, Hux was being hoisted off his feet. His hands went to his neck, trying to yank at the invisible bindings that were choking him. After a few seconds of him dangling in the air hopeless, he was thrown down the hall away from Seraph's door. As he crumpled onto the ground, Seraph spun to face the person responsible for the cruel act: Kylo Ren. 

He was standing in the middle of the hallway just outside his room's door. Wearing only black leisure pants that hugged his hops, his strong chest glistened from moisture, and damp hair fell around his face haphazardly. His torso was rippled with small battle marks while a massive scar was torn into his face that extended down past his neck into his right pectoral muscle. Nonetheless, the healed wounds did not detract from his gorgeous figure. 

Seraph felt the familiar surge of electricity as she rested eyes on him. Ren stood in a bent kneed fighting stance, with his right arm extended, and she knew he was still choking the General using the Force even after he flung red-head down the hall.

"Kylo, please stop! You'll kill him!" Seraph screamed as she dropped her boots and sprinted towards the ferocious Knight of Ren, but he seemed completely unaware of her presence. Continuing to try and pull him out of whatever trance he was in, she continued to scream. However, as weak gargling noses came from down the hall, she began to panic.

_'I have to do something; this lunatic is going to murder Hux. Yelling isn't going to do a damn thing if he's like this.'_

Ren's teeth were barred and grinding as he snarled in his frenzy to crush General Hux's windpipe.

Before she could stop herself, Seraph moved in front of Ren inches away from his body and placed both her palms right over his heart. 

Blue electrical sparks danced over her fingers and into Ren's skin as a small energy field began to encircle them. The surprise at what Seraph did caused Kylo to drop his arm and gaze down at her stilled hands, wide-eyed and slack-jawed. The heat from his chest seemed to sear into her skin, making her feel like the flesh was melting off as disjointed flashes of commander’s past blazed before her eyes, but she compelled herself not to move. 

As abruptly as the event started, it seemed to end. The energy field quickly receded, leaving an aura of calm surrounding Ren. All the hostility he had been holding in his body dissipated. And the longer Seraph's hand remand against his skin, the more relaxed he became. 

Yet, the opposite seemed to be happening to Seraph. The visions of Ren's past were still assaulting her brain as white-hot searing pain spread up her arms.

They both stood in the same position for a few seconds. Ren's eyes did not waver from their placement on Seraph's small hands over his fluttering heart. She knew she had to move, but she tried to focus on making sure the General was out of Ren's range in case his temper flared up again. Sensing that he had an unwavering focus on her touch, Seraph tried to subdue the visions in her mind to look over her shoulder and see Hux get up and feebly stumble down the hall.

With a sigh of relief, she tried to lift her palms away from Ren's chest, but one of his large hands flew on top of hers, gently pushing it back onto his skin before she could blink.

"Just…. Don't move away from me yet… Please?"

Ren's voice sounded so scared and weak as he pleaded with Seraph not to move that she couldn't help but stand statue still. Even though she barely knew the man, she was sure that he rarely ever displayed this type of vulnerability to anyone. 

Letting go of her worry about Hux, all Kylo's jealousy, fear, hatred, and suffering began pooling into her once more, leaving the commander in a state of quiet serenity. 

She saw the years of abuse from the Supreme Leader.

She felt the shame Kylo held for every murder he committed. 

She sensed all he sacrificed to the darkness.

She felt the overwhelming weight of how much he abhorred himself for doing all these horrific things.

She also saw that he felt he couldn't turn back... He believed he was too far into the darkness ever to be redeemed.

And she knew he was completely wrong about that.


	14. Regret

_Screams._

_Intense wails of pain._

_The sound of weeping permeates through the gaps of shrieking._

_Tinting everything was the color of blood with rage soaked into every drop._

Seraph could not slow the onslaught of memories flashing before her eyes as her hand remained on Kylo Ren's bare chest. The burning that had entered her palm was beginning to pass the point of intense pain to enter into the realm of numbness. 

_A red crossguard lightsaber crashing down upon hundreds of innocent humans._

_Hatred crackling behind every strike of the crossguard._

_The collective death of thousands as the previous Starkiller Base blasted Hosnian Prime into oblivion._

"Please," She begged, now unable to physically pry herself from Ren's skin. "Make it stop… please, **MAKE IT STOP**!"

_Children, boys, and girls, wearing Jedi training robes slashed down by a blue lightsaber._

Fluorescent lights blinded her as the physical world swam back into focus. Both her wrists had Ren's hands firmly wrapped around them while being held between both of their bodies. Gasping sobs began to expel themselves from Seraph as she trembled. She could feel Ren's concern and shock at what happened, but she could sense his confusion as well.

"What… What did you see?!" 

Finally able to comprehend her surroundings, Seraph ripped her wrists free from Ren's restraint and stepped back in panic.

"You… I knew you were a murderer…. But all that? You’re fucked. You’re evil. **Ben what have you DONE?!** "

She didn't care that she used his real name. She didn't care if it made him upset. His feelings did not matter. He was beyond a monster. 

Kylo Ren was evil incarnate, and she had to get away.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jamming the lock to the door behind her, Seraph's chest heaved as she tried to compartmentalize all the horror she had just mentally witnessed. If that was the power Ren harnessed from the Dark Side of the Force; she wanted absolutely nothing to do with it. Escaping was now her top priority. 

BB-7W whirled around the corner from the bathroom hallway, vocalizing inquiring beeps.

"We're going, Dubs. We will go to the hanger, hijack a damn ship, and get the fuck out of this tin can filled with psychos. Force connection be damned."

Excited whoops came from the little round droid as it zipped around the room in a frenzy.

"We are going to lay low until later, then make a break for it, ok? I just need to get cleaned up and need to think."

Within a few minutes, tepid water rained down Seraph's body releasing all the tension that had built up. She decided to remain inside the shower even after she had completely scrubbed herself raw and turned the heat as high as she could. The memories Ren had transferred inadvertently to her continued to repeat in her mind; only now she could feel an underlying emotion laced in all the events that had unfolded before her: regret. 

The more she focused on that singular emotion, the more it began to swell through the memories to a point where it overpowered the animosity and anger.

The regret soon felt as if it was going to consume the entirety of her being.

She had felt Ren's self-loathing when they initially touched, but this regret was so much more than just him disliking himself. This was such a deep melancholy that it made Seraph unable to comprehend how the man could function daily. 

After stewing in the boiling water for over an hour, she finally knew what she had to do. 

Slamming the shower off, her skin glowed pink from the intense heat and from her incessant need to remove her epidermis in a poor attempt to cleanse herself of those flashbacks. As she let the drops of water slide off her body, she knew her original rash exclamation to escape was going to be put on hold. After experiencing just the small amount of the mental torment Ren was going through daily, she knew she could not leave him. He may have been one of the most horrible people she had ever encountered, but there was a desperate man locked underneath all that evil that was trying not to suffocate.

Darkness swept around Kylo Ren like an unyielding hurricane, yet at the eye of the storm, his light remained. And he was going to break soon. Ren was too fractured to withstand much more of whatever he was going through.

Seraph was never one to believe in destiny or fate; a childhood filled with preaching's from religious zealots and torture had assured most beliefs in anything like a higher power guiding her life were beaten out of her. Yet, she suddenly felt like her decision to stay with Ren was the _right_ choice, as if this was where she was meant to be. Like every action in her life had led her to this exact moment, things were exactly as they should be. 

_'So, is this what being one with the Force is really like?' ___

__After drying herself off, Seraph let the towel fall to the bathroom floor and examined her naked body in front of the mirror. The dimpled scars that were scattered across her skin never bothered her in the past, but she could feel her face heat up with self-consciousness as she remembered how Ren had looked at her during their training. Her pale skin was still an ill-looking green from Snoke and Phasma's loving touches, and her neck was a swirl of purple from where she had been Force choked. She turned to examine her back tattoo. The geometric shapes and lines that were inked into her skin were originally meant to remind her of the faith she would never go back to, but she felt that when Ren saw the markings, they just brought more attention to how marred she truly was._ _

__Even after seeing a torrent of atrocities he had caused, Seraph still viewed him as one of the most attractive men she had ever laid eyes on. The conflicting emotions of disgust and allure that she felt towards him made her feel queasy and annoyed. Why did she care so much about how he saw her? Why did she want to cover up every inch of her body around him so maybe he could see her as a normal woman instead of some scar tissue covered mess?_ _

__

___' Why would the Force connect such a divine looking man to a freak like me? Is this some kind of cosmic joke about how we monsters belong together?'_ _ _

__

__Eager beeps were still coming from the little droid as she left the bathroom, and with a sigh, she informed BB-7W of her drastic change of heart._ _

__At the news, the droid essentially started screaming._ _

__**"I KNOW, I KNOW, WILL YOU SHUT UP?!"** Seraph snapped as she pulled on a pair of slightly loose, dark olive green fabric capris and a light brown flowy hooded top over her undergarments from the now fully stocked closet in her room. _ _

__With irritation, she slammed the drawers to the dresser in her closet shut and whirled around to face her mechanical friend._ _

__"Look, I know we both believe that hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side, but I truly feel like the Force is telling me to stay. It just came over me in the shower, and I can't ignore it and I… I can't leave him like this, Dubs. I have never encountered a being so conflicted and suffering so deeply."_ _

__A mournful wooooeeee rose from BB-7W as its primary photoreceptor sunk to gaze at the floor._ _

__"I'm sorry old friend. I miss The Pack Rat and our freedom as well. But, I promise you we will get back to it soon. I just need to follow this… feeling? Shit, I don't even know if you could even call it that… I just know this is something I have to do."_ _

__She crouched down and gave the droid a quick peck on its head assembly and then sauntered towards the door of her quarters._ _

__"I'm going to try and perform some damage control next door in Ren's quarters. If I don't come back in an hour, assume he killed me and burn the First Order to the ground. 'Kay Dubs?"_ _

__BB-7W crackled, indicating it did not appreciate her remark._ _

__With a thumbs up and a wink towards her droid, Seraph unlocked her room door, and with a gentle whoosh, it slid open._ _

__The good thing was Ren's quarters were right next to hers… However, the BAD thing was that Ren's quarters were right next to hers... The time she had to mentally prepare herself for whatever was about to transpire between them was concise since she was right in front of his door within thirty steps._ _

__Exhaling, she gave four gentle knocks on the door._ _

__"Ren? I'm sorry about what I said."_ _

__Silence_ _

__"This entire experience with you on this ship has been absolutely insane for me. I wasn't thinking straight earlier, and I just wanted to talk.."_ _

__More silence._ _

__She knew he was inside his quarters. She could sense his pulsating aura behind the door, and she still felt that ridiculous magnetic pull towards where ever he was located._ _

___'Is this mother fucker ignoring me?'_ _ _

__"Look, I know it's been crazy for you too. That's why I think we should sit down and have a little chat."_ _

__Still Nothing._ _

__This time Seraph's fists pounded on the door, causing load bangs to echo down the vacant hallway of the spaceship._ _

__'Listen, _Master_ , I am **NOT MOVING** until you open this damn door and face me! And so help me, I am one of the most stubborn people you have ** _EVER_** met so that I can wait outside this do-"_ _

__The door slammed open, and the smell of melted plastic and burnt metal filled her nostrils. Ren's bare chest was once again in front of her as he panted with exhaustion. His arms were extended over the door's frame, blocking her view into the room. She slowly turned her head up and board her green eyes into his deep brown ones._ _

__"Go away."_ _

__Though barely audible, venom was laced into every syllable as Ren's sweaty face glared down at Seraph. Unperturbed, she stood on her tiptoes, bobbing her head around, trying to see past his lumbering frame._ _

__"Nice to see you too," She sang sarcastically as she looked back into Ren's face. Perspiration was dripping down his hairline and to the top of his nose and falling to the ground as he leaned into the doorframe. His eyes were bloodshot and his eyelids were swollen._ _

___'Has he been crying?'_ _ _

__"Let me in. Let me apologize. And let's figure out what the hell we are going to do with this whole blue lightening shenanigans and memory swapping nonsense at random times when we have skin to skin contact."_ _

__Seeing Ren's unwavering stance and stone expression, Seraph decided to do things her way since he was uncooperative. In one swift move, she ducked under one of his extended arms and squeezed past his lumbering body into his quarters._ _

__She gasped as her hand flew to cover her mouth._ _

__Ren's entire living space had been destroyed in a raged fuel lightsaber temper tantrum._ _


End file.
